Reasoning, Justification and Timing

You know how sometimes when you get a thought or idea in your head about something, you seem to be more perceptive to that thought or idea around you? How you start to seeing or hearing and being reminded of this thought and how through these various situations your idea will be either affirmed in you mind or will be disproved? Well I've been having this happen a lot to me lately. Like there is this important message that needs to get through to me, and through repetitions and reminders from all around me hopefully I will take it to heart.

At our Convention last month a main point that stood out to me was that of our reasoning. Then since then I keep seeing this caution in my personal study, at the Meetings, through various examples and conversations with friends. How our reasoning can be off, how we can reason or justify something wrongfully. While the knowledge that the heart is "treacherous and desperate" is accepted it's hard to swallow that our logic and judgment can be misleading as well. There are so many things that because of wrongful desires and allowing our hearts to affect our logic, we can start to come up with all these various reasons as to why what is not ok, now is for us. We can justify this to ourselves, then sometimes to others as well. This idea makes everything so uncertain. Remembering though while our circumstances, attitudes and view points change with time, Jehovah's standards stay the same always and are trustworthy. This brings the ever strong need for self evaluation, which I feel I am constantly doing, especially right now.
I feel like I can't trust my thinking at all. After many changes in my circumstances, I find myself more emotional than ever and this just makes me feel vulnerable to allowing my treacherous heart to start overtaking my logic and causing me to reason and justify things in my life that are far from the correct path I should be on. This is why I am grateful for all of these reminders that I've been given. Reminding me to constantly be on guard and honestly self evaluating my thinking and reasoning. Hopefully as I adjust better to all that is happening in my life, I can be a little more laxed and trust myself a little more, but only a little.

This has all made me look and see where others have failed as well, as a warning for myself. Trying to distinguish where they might have started to justify that their actions were no longer harmful, and various warning signs to look for before their eventual fall. Do I find myself close to any of these bad examples that I know? Where am I really, and where do I need to be?

Perspective

I've been thinking of how much the simple pass of time can change your perspective on things. How something that was once so precious and special to you at first, after you've had it awhile it just becomes a normal part of your everyday life. No longer viewed as something special just there. Possibly even forgetting it's even there at all, a constant oversight, lost. Then sadly you only are brought back to remembering just how important and special it is to you when you are at risk of loosing it or worse no longer have it.

I was thinking too of how this can even happen with people, our friends and loved ones. How when we don't get to see someone we love that often we cherish every moment we do get to spend with them. Then those we see everyday or are always in our lives, like our family, we tend to not value as much. Even possibly get irritated with some of their personal traits when too much time is spent with the person. Sometimes the irritation and annoyance can even be more focused on than how much you actually do love this person, and how much they contribute to your life. It makes me think of how growing up my little brother and I didn't get along that much, and it was always usually over stupid little things. Then as soon as I no longer saw him everyday, or had to share a bathroom, etc. I missed having him just right there close to me. To have someone to laugh with, to vent to, to just have someone there at times. So now when I spend time with him I appreciate our relationship and try not to let all the little things that still may come up affect that.

While I think the sense of novelty and splendor with anything or anyone will eventually have to fade, I can only wish that I do not let it be extinguished. Try and take the time to really evaluate all that I have that is truly precious in my life and how much different my life would be if I no longer had that/them in my life, then cherish these.